Before we begin, what is your first name?

Your Love Pattern

supplier

decoder

reconciler

performer

sentinel

pendulum

sovereign

archetype

next_url

email

source

Why now

I keep ending up in the same place, and I'm ready for it to end.

Something just happened, and I need to understand myself.

I've noticed a pattern, and I want to name it.

Moment I

“I go back through our last messages to find where it changed.”

“He always comes back. I'll wait until he does.”

“Did I say something that made me less appealing?”

“I miss him, and I'm already half-deciding to end it.”

“Maybe he's overwhelmed. I'll send something to make his day easier.”

@Before we begin, what is your first name?, he hasn't replied in two days. What is your first thought?

Moment II

I tell him, and somehow I end up defending my ex.

I wonder why he's asking, and what he'll do with the answer.

I open up completely, then regret it the next morning.

I change the subject. That isn't his business yet.

I tell him everything, so he understands how to treat me.

I give the version that makes me look healed and easy.

I keep it short. That's a lot to share with someone new.

Early on, he asks: “What happened in your last relationship?” What do you do?

Moment III

Feel let down, and say yes the moment he reschedules.

Make sure my reply sounds relaxed, not needy.

Wonder what came up, and try to work it out.

Feel a little relieved. My evening is mine again.

Tell him it's fine, and offer to bring him dinner.

I'm annoyed, and I see whether he rearranges it himself.

He cancels an hour before your plans: “Something came up.” What do you do?

Moment IV

I want him more the moment he says it, and I'm angry that I do.

I stay. He'll get there. He always comes back to me.

I take him at his word, even if I'm disappointed.

I replay it all night, trying to work out what he really means.

I act like I'm not looking for anything serious either.

I decide to show him what being with me is like, until he's ready.

He says: “I'm not ready for anything serious, but I really like you.” What happens in you?

Moment V

I start doing more for him, so it stays this good.

I start looking for the reason it won't work.

I relax into it, and I'm curious where it goes.

I work harder to stay the woman he's falling for.

I start watching for the first sign it's changing.