When love feels hard and you can’t explain why… this quiz helps you start untangling the truth.

You keep asking "Is this normal? Is it me?" You’ve tried to be understanding. Patient. Empathetic. You’ve told yourself it’s just stress, just communication issues, just 'a phase'.

But something still feels off — and you’re tired of questioning yourself.

This quiz isn't here to decide anything for you.

But it will help you tune in to what your body and your gut have been trying to say all along. Whether what you’re experiencing is healthy, repairable, or something deeper — you deserve to have that clarity so that you can figure out what you want to do next.

Below are 10 short questions. Answer according to what happens most of the time in your relationship. If more than one answer fits, go with what happens most often. At the end you will receive immediate results showing whether your relationship is healthy, has concerning patterns, or is likely emotionally abusive. You'll then receive a personalized email from me that includes:

- Next steps tailored to your quiz result

- A free copy of my Red Flags / Green Flags PDF You do not have to live confused by love and life anymore. And you are certainly not alone. We’ll walk through this one step at a time — together. -Kensie

What's your first name? (Anonymous is fine.)

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After you bring up something that hurt you, what usually happens?

A

They listen, take responsibility, and try to repair it — even if it takes a little time.

B

They get defensive or shut down. Sometimes they say they'll "work on it."

C

They flip it on me, act like I’m attacking them, or say I’m “too sensitive.”

What happens when you say “no” or disagree?

Untitled multiple choice field

A

It’s respected, even if they don't like it.

B

They push back or try to negotiate — and I sometimes give in.

C

They guilt-trip, get angry, or ignore the boundary altogether.

How does your partner react when you're upset or emotional?

A

They stay present, listen, and try to understand.

B

They get defensive or try to fix it without listening.

C

They get irritated, blame me, leave the room, or say I'm manipulative.

Do you ever feel like you’re walking on eggshells?

A

No — I feel safe being myself, even when things are hard.

B

Sometimes I watch what I say because they’re unpredictable when stressed.

C

Constantly. I scan their tone, their mood, and their body language before I speak.

When things go wrong between you, how is conflict handled?

A

We both take accountability when needed and make changes over time.

B

We talk about it, but it feels like the same problems happen again.

C

It becomes about how I hurt them, even when they were the one who crossed a line.

Has your partner ever made you feel like your memory or feelings can’t be trusted?

A

No. Even when we disagree, they don’t make me feel crazy.

B

Occasionally, they remember things differently, but we work it out.

C

All the time. I find myself doubting what I saw, heard, or felt — and wondering if I made it up.

How does your partner talk about your friends, family, or support system?

A

They may not be close with them, but they’re respectful and supportive of my relationships.

B

They’ve made comments that made me second-guess spending time with others.

C

They’ve created drama with people I care about or acted jealous when I try to connect elsewhere.

How often do you feel accepted in this relationship?

A

Most of the time — even during hard moments, I feel like we’re on the same team.

B

It depends on the day. Sometimes I feel close, sometimes I feel like I have to shrink.

C

Rarely. I feel like I’m constantly editing myself or holding back to avoid conflict.

When they apologize, what does it usually look like?

A

They name what they did, acknowledge the harm, and follow through with change.

B

They say sorry but with excuses — like “I was just tired” or “you know how I get.”

C

It’s vague or manipulative. They might cry, give gifts, or say “sorry” just to end the conversation.

How does this relationship make you feel?

A

I feel safe, seen, and supported — even when things aren’t perfect.

B

I feel anxious and drained sometimes, but I’m not sure if it’s the relationship or just life.

C

I feel exhausted, constantly on edge, and confused. I second-guess everything.