It’s a bland day outside. Weather is happening. Your planet is orbiting the sun, or the other way around, depending on perspective, location, and religious beliefs.
Birds are singing, flowers are blooming.
You, the reader, are doomscrolling through content crafted specifically to captivate your dwindling attention span.
Like most, you are trying to escape the current state of your world by immersing yourself in a different, equally shitty, digital reality.
And then you come across a shiny, brand-new online quiz. A survey, of sorts.
Except this one is different from the ones you’ve seen before. For one, it's very long. 96 questions?! Who the hell would make a quiz that long?
And, on top of that, it’s a classpect quiz? Talk about being late to the game.
And yet… Your finger keeps on scrolling down to the link, craving that sweet dopamine.
Surprise, bitch. I bet you thought you’d seen the last of this color in all its foxy #f2a400 glory.
Recently, I have been pondering over the meager numbers of the Theseus’ crew. Don’t get me wrong, we’re a “quality-over-quantity” bunch, but it doesn’t hurt to have more hands on deck.
But those hands need to be classified into confusing and esoteric categories first. That’s what being in a Narrative is all about: having a role, a Class and an Aspect to define your position on the stage.
Your generation needs identity, direction and a job. That’s why you’re always hopping from trend to trend and anchoring your ego to abstract aesthetic concepts, instead of buying property and enjoying your life, free of the pesky concept of self-reflection and critical thinking.
So who better to assign you an identity than the Ultimate Chief Executive of Heart? You won’t have to “find yourself” anymore.
Give some meaning to your insignificant life.
