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Authentic Life Now Couples Alignment Check

See where you’re aligned, where you may be experiencing the relationship differently, and what deserves attention next. Answer from your own experience during roughly the past three months. Do not coordinate answers.

Before starting, agree on one memorable, reasonably private relationship code—for example, JORDAN-RILEY-4827. Both partners must enter the exact same code, including spelling, numbers, and punctuation. One partner should select Partner A and the other Partner B.

Relationship code

Partner slot

Partner A

Partner B

Your first name or chosen label

Partner's first name or chosen label

Your email address

Consent: I understand that individual answers remain private by default and the couples report shares dimension-level patterns rather than every item response.

I confirm my consent.

Communication

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
I feel comfortable bringing up important issues with my partner.
I generally feel heard and understood when I express what I am thinking or feeling.
We can discuss difficult subjects without the conversation quickly becoming destructive.

Emotional Connection

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
I feel emotionally close to my partner.
My partner understands who I am beneath my responsibilities and roles.
I feel emotionally supported by my partner when I am struggling.

Conflict and Repair

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
We can disagree without attacking, humiliating, threatening, or intentionally hurting each other.
After conflict, we are usually able to repair the relationship and reconnect.
Problems tend to get resolved rather than repeatedly resurfacing without progress.

Trust and Respect

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
I trust my partner to be honest with me about important matters.
I generally feel emotionally safe being open and vulnerable with my partner.
We treat each other with respect, including when we disagree.

Intimacy and Affection

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
The level of physical affection in our relationship feels caring and mutually comfortable.
We can talk honestly and respectfully about intimacy, desire, and boundaries.
I feel wanted, valued, and accepted in our intimate relationship.

Time and Presence

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
We spend enough meaningful, undistracted time together.
We regularly show affection, appreciation, or care toward one another.
Our routines leave room for connection, play, or shared enjoyment.

Partnership and Responsibilities

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
Responsibilities in our relationship are handled in a reasonably fair way.
My needs and priorities matter in decisions that affect both of us.
We function more like teammates than opponents.

Independence and Boundaries

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
We can maintain individual interests, friendships, and growth without threatening the relationship.
We can state and respect personal limits without using them to control or punish each other.
I can be authentically myself in this relationship.

Family and Finances

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
We can talk openly and respectfully about money, spending, saving, and financial stress.
We are reasonably aligned about family relationships, caregiving, parenting, or household expectations that apply to us.
When family or financial pressures arise, we face them as partners.

Future and Growth

	1 Strongly disagree	2 Disagree	3 Somewhat disagree	4 Somewhat agree	5 Agree	6 Strongly agree
I believe we want compatible things for our future.
We can talk openly about changes we would like to make in our relationship.
I can imagine this relationship becoming healthier and stronger over the next several years.

What is currently the strongest part of your relationship?

What is one area you most want to improve?

What do you wish your partner understood better about your experience?

If your relationship improved significantly over the next six months, what would be noticeably different?

What is one action you are personally willing to take?

Scope Note: This assessment is a non-clinical reflection and coaching tool. It is not therapy, diagnosis, crisis support, legal advice, or a validated psychological test. Scores describe each partner’s current perception; they do not determine who is right, predict whether a relationship will last, or measure either person’s worth.

Safety Note: Do not use this tool for a joint discussion when there is fear, coercion, threats, stalking, physical or sexual violence, or concern about retaliation. Seek appropriate local emergency, domestic violence, medical, legal, or licensed mental-health support. If anyone is in immediate danger, contact local emergency services.