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Which Default Mode Runs Your Show?

We’ve all got sneaky “default settings” — the survival scripts that kick in when life gets stressful. Take this 3-minute quiz to spot yours, and get quick ways to disrupt the loop.

👉 No grades. No shame. Just clarity (with a side of attitude).

What is your email?

*

What is your first name?

*

When someone compliments you, your first thought is…

*

A

“Good, I must have done well.”

B

“Do they really mean it?"

C

“Okay… can we move on now?”

D

“I wish they noticed what I did for them instead.”

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

A project deadline is coming up. You…

*

A

Push yourself to deliver something impressive

B

Research, tweak, and revise endlessly

C

Procrastinate until the last possible moment

D

Offer to help others with theirs before finishing your own

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When conflict comes up, you usually…

*

A

Smooth it over to keep the peace

B

Rehash the conversation in your head for days

C

Avoid it entirely

D

Step in to mediate or solve it for everyone

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When you think about failing, what stings most?

*

A

Letting people down

B

Looking stupid or unprepared

C

Having to face the mess

D

Not being able to help or fix things

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When you’re stressed, your coping move is…

*

A

Put on a strong front, keep smiling

B

Make endless pros/cons lists

C

Zone out (scrolling, Netflix, snacks, wine)

D

Take on someone else’s problem instead

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

Which phrase feels most like you?

*

A

“I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

B

“I just need to figure this out.”

C

“I’ll deal with it later.”

D

“I just want to help.”

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

If you’re about to try something new, you…

*

A

Worry about how others will perceive you

B

Gather way more info than you need

C

Put it off until the last minute

D

Jump in to help others try it first

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When you reflect on your past, you often…

*

A

Judge yourself for not living up to expectations

B

Replay decisions, wondering what you should’ve done differently

C

Forget or gloss over the hard parts

D

Focus on how you could’ve been more helpful

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

People often describe you as…

*

A

Polished, reliable, high-achieving

B

Smart, thoughtful, detail-oriented

C

Chill, easygoing, “go with the flow”

D

Caring, dependable, the “glue”

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

Your biggest inner critic line sounds like…

*

A

“You’re only as good as your last success.”

B

“You should’ve known better.”

C

“You’re lazy.”

D

“It’s your job to hold it all together.”

E

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.