Which Default Mode Runs Your Show?

We’ve all got sneaky “default settings” — the survival scripts that kick in when life gets stressful. Take this 3-minute quiz to spot yours, and get quick ways to disrupt the loop.

👉 No grades. No shame. Just clarity (with a side of attitude).

What is your first name?

When someone compliments you, your first thought is…

“Good, I must have done well.”

“Do they really mean it?"

“Okay… can we move on now?”

“I wish they noticed what I did for them instead.”

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

A project deadline is coming up. You…

Push yourself to deliver something impressive

Research, tweak, and revise endlessly

Procrastinate until the last possible moment

Offer to help others with theirs before finishing your own

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When conflict comes up, you usually…

Smooth it over to keep the peace

Rehash the conversation in your head for days

Step in to mediate or solve it for everyone

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When you think about failing, what stings most?

Letting people down

Looking stupid or unprepared

Having to face the mess

Not being able to help or fix things

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When you’re stressed, your coping move is…

Put on a strong front, keep smiling

Make endless pros/cons lists

Zone out (scrolling, Netflix, snacks, wine)

Take on someone else’s problem instead

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

Which phrase feels most like you?

“I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

“I just need to figure this out.”

“I’ll deal with it later.”

“I just want to help.”

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

If you’re about to try something new, you…

Worry about how others will perceive you

Gather way more info than you need

Put it off until the last minute

Jump in to help others try it first

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

When you reflect on your past, you often…

Judge yourself for not living up to expectations

Replay decisions, wondering what you should’ve done differently

Forget or gloss over the hard parts

Focus on how you could’ve been more helpful

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

People often describe you as…

Polished, reliable, high-achieving

Smart, thoughtful, detail-oriented

Chill, easygoing, “go with the flow”

Caring, dependable, the “glue”

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

Your biggest inner critic line sounds like…

Q10

“You’re only as good as your last success.”

“You should’ve known better.”

“You’re lazy.”

“It’s your job to hold it all together.”

None of these hit — I’ve worked through this already / doesn’t feel like me.

Which Default Mode Runs Your Show?

What is your email?

What is your first name?

When someone compliments you, your first thought is…

A project deadline is coming up. You…

When conflict comes up, you usually…

When you think about failing, what stings most?

When you’re stressed, your coping move is…

Which phrase feels most like you?

If you’re about to try something new, you…

When you reflect on your past, you often…

People often describe you as…

Your biggest inner critic line sounds like…